Jakiela Family – Page 6 – It's All About Family

The Season of Betty – About Betty Part 2

My previous post was about my mother, Betty, about her life growing up and how she lived. This one is about her and what I remember. Most of the time period I’m talking about here is from the early 60s through 1987 when she died.

My mother was casual. She didn’t have jobs where she had to wear business clothes. She didn’t wear jeans (I don’t think she ever had a pair?!), but she wore comfortable clothes. She wore dresses to church every week along with a hat until we didn’t have to wear them anymore. In our 20s, my dad would give us money to go Christmas shopping for clothes for her. I think we did a pretty good job! We would find pants and nice tops and sweaters. She always seemed happy to get them and wore them so I guess she did! I liked doing that.

My mother didn’t wear makeup. She probably had some 20-year-old stuff hanging around and I remember one time Janice put it on her when she was going out. That must be why I have no idea (or think I have no idea) how to put it on!

My mother was LOUD! When we were young and playing in the neighborhood, she would WHISTLE for us. Like dogs! And you could hear it from just about any area of the circle (picture houses in the middle and the street is a circle around them). So embarrassing.! And when she went to football or basketball games when we were in high school her yell was so loud! My sisters and I of course, now are probably just as loud as she was!

My mother was friendly. When she went to track meets, I remember kids sitting with her and talking and she was always friendly to them. In my teenage brain I’d be saying “ugh”, but looking back, she set that example for us. I think all three of us are very comfortable and interested in what young people have to say.

My mom was involved in our school working at book sales, as part of the Mothers Circle at church, as part of the Mother of Twins Club, and with our Brownie and Girl Scout troops. But she didn’t get involved with any sports politics or try to ingratiate herself with any coaches (ok, only cheerleading coach), and when I felt the need to defend myself or my sister she was fine with it.

My dad would take us on walks or bike rides on Sundays around town to give her some time alone. I’m sure she never had to suggest it, he was more than willing, but I’m sure she really appreciated it! I imagine we three were pretty exhausting.

SHE WAS A READER! I feel like that deserves all caps. She had more books and magazines than even I have ever had! There were 2 bookcases at her childhood home on Clifton Street full of books that I’m sure were all hers. She was a member of the Readers Digest Condensed Books program with 4 books a year and each contained 4-5 books. Nancy Drew, Cherry Ames, and other teenage girl book series were on those shelves! I think some might have been above our reading maturity level, but we read them anyway and she didn’t stop us! She subscribed to 3 or 4 magazines a month that were collected on the end tables through the year(s). She would buy years worth of National Geographic magazines at tag sales. She just loved the written word. I can clearly see her sitting at the table for breakfast with a book in her lap, drinking her coffee, and eating toast. There was never a book or magazine not by her side.

She and her siblings stayed close both in their physical locations and by gathering together. They all continued to live in Wallingford and raise their families and we always got together for Christmas, Easter, and kids’ birthday parties. I’m glad they did that. It could have gone a lot differently because of the age difference in all the kids, but with her niece (Judy) having her first child (Ann) only one year after us twins, it gave them all a new connection. She was particularly close to Aunt Tootsie who was like her second mother and Uncle Connie who was unmarried until the early 1960s when she married Auntie Ann who had 2 adult children and they lived right next to Kendrick Park so we so them very often stopping in for his delicious baked treats!

She was a good woman and a good mother and she lead by example rather than telling us what to do and how we should be as we grew up. I think that sticks more than words!

The Season of Betty Part 1

I think I’ve always wanted to put this period of time in writing because it was a huge turning point in my life. It was the end of me and the beginning of me all rolled into one.

My mother, Betty, started acting oddly in the fall of 1986. She and my father took a trip to Ireland that she WON on St. Patrick’s Day that March through WELI radio. I remember it like it was yesterday. I was upstairs after taking a shower, hearing a shout and a crash, and immediately thinking “oh my God, they said her name!”. And yes, they did, and they hung up on her because she was so excited! The trip was great and they had a wonderful time together but shortly after that, she became more forgetful than usual.

By 1986, I was the only daughter living at home and my three-plus-year relationship had ended in October. Which was probably for the best with what lie ahead. December rolled around and I noticed she hadn’t done any Christmas shopping. She always shopped for all of us and would have stacks of presents on Christmas morning (sometimes wrapping until the early hours!). It took her out to the stores in Hamden and we shopped for everyone, including me!

The holiday went well and we all got together again that week because Aunt Judy and Uncle Mal were in town. I went to work in the morning and then headed over in the afternoon and Mom was home and was coming on her own. We waited, and waited. When we called, she said she was coming, she’d be there soon and we waited some more. When she finally came, she fell asleep on the couch head back in the crowd of people.

After the first of the year, things just got stranger. All my life, Sunday mornings we went to church for 9:15 mass. But suddenly, she’d still be sitting reading the paper at 9 am. We’d hustle her up to get ready and we’d barely make it. Another Sunday, it was Auntie Edna’s surprise birthday party at the Knight’s hall and we barely made it before the guest of honor!

I worked at Channel 8 in the Programming Department and I would come in every morning and laugh and say “oh my God you won’t believe what my mother did last night!”. Until one day I came in and said to my boss “I think there’s something wrong with my mother”, and burst into tears. Larry Manne, bless his soul, rolled with it, listened, and gave me a hug.

Shortly after that, Gail and I reached out to our cousin Judy Behme. Judy was our first cousin and my godmother and her kids were our age and she was someone we always knew we could turn to. I was at Judy’s house and we were on the phone with Gail trying to figure out what was going on. I think at one point an actual thought we all agreed on was “I hope it’s a brain tumor and not Alzheimer’s” because, with a tumor, there could be surgery and recovery! Little did we know….

Mystery Solved!

FACEBOOK – March 22, 2014

I’m sucked back into my family search on Ancestry.com

Poor great-uncle Bronislaw Liro and his wife Mary. They became a reality last night when their marriage record popped up – but nothing else.

Then a quick google search of his name gave me two deaths – one for their son at 8 days old of infant cholera, and another for their daughter at 8 months old (4 years later) of Infant Cholera.

And not a trace of them anywhere else going forward. It’s always 1 step forward and 2 steps back.

This post written in 2014 popped up for me the other day on Facebook. I’d forgotten all about it posting it and want to share what I found out a few years later.

Just some background – I had the names of Louis, Joseph, and Mitchell Liro floating around in my research notebooks because their Massachusetts locations fit with what I knew about Bronislaw. I might have sent a letter to one of them with no response.

“Joseph Liro” popped up as a DNA match in 2017 and I sent him a message through Ancestry. Sadly, not many people respond to messages! But I got lucky this time.

Joseph is the grandson of Bronislaw and Maria! Here’s a refresher on Bronislaw and Maria:

Bronislaw was born in 1881 and immigrated to the US in 1905, and headed to Three Rivers, Mass his older sister Aniela and her husband Josef Mikula.

Maria came to the US expecting to be joined by her sweetheart but she never heard from him, met Bronislaw and married him. Then oops! Turns out the sweetheart had trouble raising the money for his passage and when he finally made it to the U.S. Maria was already married to Bronislaw.

They were married sometime prior to 1908. They had a son John who died at 6 days old in August of 1908 of Infant Cholera. Joseph’s father Louis was born in 1909. A daughter Katy in 1911 was 6 months old in July of 1912 when she died of Infant Cholera. Following that, Mitchell Stanley was born in 1913.

So right there, Joseph brought together the names that have been circling around each other all these years!

Two to three years later (1915 or 16), Bronislaw and Maria (unlike my grandparents and great aunt and uncle) have a little nest egg from working in the textile mills and decide to GO BACK TO POLAND.

We all know what happened shortly after that – World War I broke out. Bronislaw fought in the Austrian Army and the “victorious Soviets” took him prisoner and sent him to Siberia.

As the war raged on, Maria was afraid that her sons, Louis and Mitchell would be called up to fight in the Polish Civil War even though they were American citizens, so she sent them back to the United States to live with a friend of hers.

In the late 1920s/early 1930s, Bronislaw escaped Siberia where he tended the horses at the camp. He appeared at the family farm in the village of Turza in southeastern Poland saying “I escaped and have come home”. Life went on and they had more children.

What happened to Louis and Mitchell? It sounds like Louis never saw his father again because he never went back to Poland. Mitchell fought in Italy during WWII and traveled through Poland but I don’t know if Bronislaw was still alive or if he went to their home.

After WWII, Maria came to the United States for a short visit, lived with Louis and his family but she returned to Poland in 1962 “to die”. Louis traveled to Poland often in the 80s and 90s and met his Aunt Katarzyna and her children and visited his grandparents’ graves.

Based on their birthdates and the dates of WWI, Louis and Mitchell would have been young when the war broke out! Louis said, “my father and his brother were so grateful to this woman (who took them in) that they had her buried in our family plot in Indian Orchard, Mass. which is a neighborhood in Springfield. I think it’s sort of a Yalesville to our Wallingford.

So that’s the story of Bronislaw and Maria. They all lived years longer than Aniela and Antonia but it was still fraught with heartache.

The Letter From Poland

Two years ago while cleaning out my Auntie Helen’s apartment after she passed away, I found a letter from her uncle Antoni Jakiela among her papers. It was dated January 19, 1947 and addressed to her brother Steve.

Letter from Antoni

It was such a shock to find it and I made feeble attempts over the last couple of years to get it translated. I even attempted myself with the help of Google but gave up quickly.

A couple of weeks ago I reached out again to Facebook and my friend Amy, my cousin Jim and friend Andrea quickly came to the rescue. I emailed a copy out to everyone and Amy’s co-worker jumped on it and nearly had it done that day!

I received the transcribed letter back and was sad to read how the war had affected him and his family. There was a sweetness to the letter and the questions he asked. I did discover three new family members when he talked about his sons but I don’t know what became of them or if they had families of their own. I’ll keep searching!

Antoni Letter Transcribed

Signs From My Father

Leaving me dimes and sending me cardinals

Growing up my sisters and I heard about and saw pictures of our parents at the El Rancho Motel in Myrtle Beach South Carolina. They went there on their honeymoon and went again with my dad’s sister Helen and her husband Ticker. They loved it there, and we loved looking at the pictures over and over again.

It’s no longer there but a search on the internet had this to say: “The sprawling grounds included 75 air-conditioned rooms with over 250-person capacity, car shelters, outdoor grilles and room service, a meeting room, and an adjoining restaurant. The palms and pines-wooded lot also included an 18-hole putting green, shuffleboard, ping pong, and their distinctive illuminated swimming pool, measuring 90′ x 40′, with a small island in the middle with palm trees.” From that description I know why they loved it – heck I would too!

Last year and a few week ago, my husband and I spent a week in Surfside Beach, South Carolina which is just one town south of Myrtle Beach.

My mind was on planning and packing all the week before we left and we were doing a lot of weather watching and worrying whether we’d have sun or a week of rain. It was evident my father wanted me to know he was thinking about our trip too when I reached my hand up in the shower to get the soap – and put my hand on a dime! In the shower! Boy that was weird….

We broke the trip down there into two days this time so we wouldn’t be burnt out and stopped in La Plata MD which is about halfway. It was a Best Western and I have a membership card. I stuck my hand in my pocketbook to get my card holder and came up with a dime STUCK to my card holder!

I said “Daddy you are tricky! I know you’re with us!”

Once we got there we spent a lot of time on the balcony of the condo where we were on the 3rd floor. It was relaxing looking at the water or just listening to the sound while reading our books. While sitting there one day I heard a very familiar bird sound…..

Sure enough – there’s a cardinal sitting there saying hello. He showed himself during the week and finally, on the last day of our visit while I was sitting on the couch, I looking up and he was was fluttering around at our balcony rail! He sat for a second and then flew off.

I can hear my father saying “That was a good time Nanc – I’m glad you had fun”.

Charles Jakiela in World War I

Proud to fight for his adopted country

My grandfather, Charles Jakiela immigrated to the United States from Lubatowa Poland in 1905. He was married with two children when the time came in June of 1917 to register for the draft.

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Although he could have, he chose not to claim an exemption and left his wife, Antonia and two sons – Steven, 4 years old and Edward, 2 – behind in Southington Connecticut when he headed to Camp Devens in Ayer Massachusetts. When asked why he enlisted when he could have been exempt he said it was because “he loved his country”.

The construction of Fort Devens started in early June, 1917, and was performed by a labor force of 5,000 workers which in just 10 weeks built a small city consisting of 1400 buildings, 20 miles of road, 400 miles of electric wiring and 60 miles of heating pipes in addition to water and sewer service. Due to the speed of its development, Camp Devens formally opened at the beginning of September, 1917. It was the first of 16 National Army cantonments to be completed in the country, processing and training more than 100,000 soldiers of the 76^th and 12^th Divisions from 1917-1919. (from http://www.worldwar1letters.wordpress.com). It was here at Camp Devens that Charles became a United States Citizen.

Charles_citizenship_0001

Fun fact – 31 Liberty Street in Southington listed on the Certificate is the same location that cousin Steve Jakiela had his deli and catering business – Liberty Deli!

Based on his headstone, I knew that he was in Battery C 302nd F.A. (field artillary). I really didn’t give it much thought until I saw Bill O’Reilly on an episode of Finding Your Roots and the host, Henry Gates, talked to him about his grandfather who was in the a division of the army out of New York and they talked about how he fought in the Meuse-Argonne Offense in October-November of 1918. Something just made me start looking again because I knew there had to be more information for Charles’s service.

I found out that the 302nd field artillary regiment was part of the 151st Field Artillery, which was part of the 76th Division, which was part of the 5th Army Corps commanded by Major General Omar Bundy. The 302nd field artillary regiment were trained with the 4.7″ artillery guns. I also found the following online:

Seventy-Sixth Division (National Army)

Known as the “Liberty Bell Division.” Insignia is a blue liberty bell superimposed on a khaki square. Organized at Camp Devens, Mass., in Sept., .1917. The division was composed of National Army drafts from Maine, New Hampshire, Vermont, Rhode Island and Connecticut. The first units embarked for overseas on July 5, 1918, and the last units arrived in France on July 31, 1918. Upon arrival in France the division was designated as a depot division and ordered to the St. Aignan area. Here the division was broken up, training cadres were formed and the personnel used as replacements for combat divisions at the front. The special units, such as the Signal Battalion and Sanitary Troops, were sent forward as corps and army troops.

Commanding generals: Maj.Gen. H. F. Hodges,. Aug. 25 to Nov. 27, 1917; Brig. Gen. Wm. Wiegel, Nov. 27, 1917 to Feb. 13, 1918; Maj. Gen. H. F. Hodges, Feb.13 to Nov. 11,1918.

This division was composed of the following organizations: 15ast and 152nd Inf. Brigs.; 301st, 302nd, 303rd, 304th Inf. Regts.; 301st, 302d, 303d Machine Gun Bns.; 301st, 302d, 303d Fld. Arty. Regts.; 301st Trench Mortar Battery; 301st Engr. Regt. and Train; 301st Fld. Sig. Bn.; 301st Hqs. Train and M. P.; 301st Amm. Train; 301st Supply Train; 301st Sanitary Train (301st, 302d, 303d and 304th Field Hospitals and Amb. Cos.).

I also found somewhere else (really should have written websites down!) that the 302d and 303d FA Regiments were in the St. Mihiel Sector from 11/2-11/11/18.

He survived his time in France, although I’m told he was heavily gassed, only to have disaster strike on the way home. According to both Auntie Helen and Uncle Eddie, on the way out of France (England?-It was never said where), as the train the troops were on went over a trestle, a previously unexploded bomb exploded! Charles landed in a brook and his head was smashed. Auntie Helen said he had a scar from the front of his head down the back. A man from Bristol saved him. Once they arrived home, every Saturday night “four guys on motorcycles” came to their South Center Street home in Southington to visit. Auntie Helen said he received a pension because of his injury and he would routinely write letters to the government because they wanted to cut his pension!

In 2002, I requested and received a Certification of Military Service for Charles which told me he was in the Army from October 4 of 1917 to April 30, 1919. Unfortunately, in 1973, there was a fire in the area that destroyed a major portion of records for Army military personnel from 1912 through 1959.

Charles_military_discharge

He died at age 45 when Steve the oldest was 23 and John the youngest was turning 11. But that’s a story for another time. He’s buried in St. John’s cemetery. If you go in the lower driveway to the end and the road curves to the left, he’s at the top of the hill on the right. John always made sure there was an American flag by his headstone. I think I will see that there always is.

Charles_headstone

Easter Through The Years

Remembering the traditions passed down through generations.

Easter memories include:

Church on Easter Sunday morning in our finest Spring clothes – usually freezing because it wasn’t quite as warm as the outfits were designed for!;

Jakiela girls easter 64 — Jakiela Girls Easter 1964

Easter baskets with candy!;
Brunch after mass either at 121 Clifton Street or our house, Aunt Judy’s or Auntie Irene’s that would be eaten in shifts as families came and went…and usually involved a second round of food;

Pierogies, stuffed cabbage, hungarian cookies, kielbasa, ham, horseradish, hard rolls, rye bread with seeds, babka – my mouth is watering!;

One Easter in the 1970s that was so warm and it was conveniently at Aunt Judy’s down the street that we came back to our house, got our bathing suits on and laid out in the sun!;
An Easter Sunday that fell on Gail’s and my birthday and we got to carry the gifts to the alter;
Our first Easter without Mommy and it was at the Behme’s house and Judy had a birthday cake for Gail and me because our birthday was a week or so later;
Celebrating Easter with Cody, coloring eggs and going to Easter egg hunts (and I wasn’t knocking kids down to get candy for him!);

Cody_easter_egg_hunt_0001 — Cody and Wyatt 1993

Easter at cousin Joan’s house with all the kids hunting for the Golden Egg and having the Easter Bunny appear!;

Easter_at_Joans_0001 — Easter at Joan Jakiela’s 1997

Our first Easter without Daddy after he passed away on Palm Sunday in 2010 and Gail’s description of him entering the gates of heaven and everyone cheering for his arrival;
The traditions we continue with our families and pass down to our children that we hope they will continue when we are no longer with them.

Antonina Liro Jakiela

1891-1927

jakiela grandparents

Happy Birthday Antonina Liro Jakiela – my paternal grandmother born on this day January 10, 1891. She was born in Wielepole, Podkarpackie, Poland, daughter of Wojiech Liro and Mary Zahara Liro. She had an older sister Aniela born in 1871 and a brother Bronislaw born in 1881 so it appears she was the baby of the family. Various records show her name as Antonina, Antonia and Antoinette but I’ll stick with Antonina since that’s what her ship passage record says.

She arrived in New York on September 12, 1902 and headed up to Thorndike Massachusetts where her sister Aniela and brother in law Josef Mikula lived and worked in the fabric mills. They had been in the United States for a few years already and Josef paid her passage according to the ship records.

She met her husband Charles Jakiela working in the mills and they were married on June 24, 1912 in Palmer Massachusetts. This is one of two pictures that exists for Antonina and Charles and it’s on their wedding day. It looks like something from the carnival that you put your heads into because her arms are unnaturally long and bendy for being 4’9″ tall! Nevertheless, it’s a treasure.

Their first son, Steven came along less than a year later in May of 1913, followed by Edward in November of 1915. There’s a five year gap in children due to Charles heading off to World War 1 but they picked right back up with Helen in March of 1920, Walter in November of 1921 and John in June of 1924.

By the birth of Helen in 1920, they were living in Southington Connecticut.

I interviewed my Uncle Eddie one Sunday afternoon (he used to drive through the neighborhood and one day I flagged him down and invited him in) and asked him about the family. These are some things he had to say:

“mom was a nice dresser – not dumpy, frumpy Polak”
“she was very short, black black hair, alot of gold teeth and father would get mad as hell at her for spending a lot of money on clothes”
“she had a fur jacket! A Jewish guy from Hartford would come with clothes for her to buy and she’d pay him once a week”

Sadly on April 1, 1927 while pregnant with her 6th child, Antonina began hemorrhaging and was taken to the hospital. Uncle Eddie recalls: “she asked me to stay home that day so I did. A half hour later she was screaming for me to get my father and run and get the midwife on Water Street.” If I remember correctly he said his father came home from the hospital and said they would see her in the morning but in the morning the hospital called for them on the neighborhood store telephone to say she died at 3am.

Their father was heartbroken. She is buried in St. Thomas cemetery in Southington CT. Charles made a cross out of wood and carved a heart along with her name and date of birth and date of death on it. Years later Eddie had a headstone made for her at which time the wooden cross disappeared.

A couple of years ago I had the opportunity to have a reading by a medium. I was so impressed I went back again armed with questions. When I asked about Antonina, Phil’s immediate response was “she’s beautiful”. I wish I got the chance to know her. Rest in Peace Antonina Liro Jakiela.

Antonina_NEW