Jakiela – It's All About Family

Looking Back at 2025

Yesterday, I took a trip down memory lane of the people I researched and wrote about this past year. I’m proud of the information I found, stories I wrote, and living relatives I uncovered during my search. Here’s a review month by month….

January

I started the year with a couple of posts from the 52 Ancestors in 52 Weeks Challenge by Amy Johnson Crow. The first topic was “In the Beginning,” and I chose to write about my parents’ courtship and wedding. I had fun going through old photos of them from their wedding and trips with my aunt and uncle. Ancestry provided the high school yearbook pages and my mom’s collection of postcards showed us the sweetness in their relationship.

The second post was “Favorite Photo.” My favorite photo will always be the Posluszny Family photo that started this crazy research journey! I think it is in every post I wrote about the family this year. It’s probably time to frame it and put it on a wall.

The third post in January told the story of my great-uncle John Posluszny. At the end of December 2024, I wrote about solving the “mystery” of his death in 1942, so I really wanted to start my Posluszny series with his story. I connected with his granddaughter, Janine, in 2012, and she shared the photos of her father, Stanley with me. I enjoyed finding and sharing the newspaper articles with her. I currently have a message out to a great-granddaughter of John and hope I hear from her to make another family connection.

February

On the 1st of February, I wrote about my mother’s diagnosis of brain cancer. Even 38 years later, memories were fresh.

Next up was a little break from family with a post about a sampler completed in 1817 and found by my father in the attic of his paint store in the early 1980s. He held on to it always curious about where it came from. Unfortunately, I didn’t think about researching it until after he passed away in 2010. I still haven’t delivered it to the Portland Historical Society!

Another great uncle, Joseph Posluszny, was my next subject. I can hear to this day my Aunt Judy saying, “Uncle Joe Post”. I’ve worked with his great granddaughter on Ancestry for many years and the majority of pictures I have came from her. In September, I was contacted by one of Joseph’s granddaughters who lives in Connecticut about 45 minutes away. I look forward to getting to know her better and hearing her stories!

This post was born during my Posluszny research when I noticed, after 15 years of research, that my great grandmother, Caroline Straub is listed on the 1910 census as having given birth to 14 children with 8 of them at the time still living! I headed over to the amazing Geneteka website, started searching, and managed to find the records for five children who died either at birth or a very young age.

March

Early in March we said goodbye to our sweet chihuahua, Wally and late in March was the anniversary of my dad’s passing.

April

The 98th anniversary of my grandmother’s passing was in early April and if you don’t know her story, you can read it here.

I wrote about my great uncle Frank Posluszny. He was a tough one over the years to find anything about because he was in a mental institution from the 1930 federal census to the 1940 census. I had very little information on the family and wasn’t sure where to look. But as the years go by, more information becomes available and I was able to find his great-granddaughter! We emailed back and forth and she actually knew him! She sent pictures which I included in his story.

*Josephine, Frank, and Mildred Poslushny*

May

I spent May working on my great uncle Charles Posluszny’s story. I posted once to check in to say I was working on him and at the end of the month, completed it. Once again, there are grandchildren and great grandchildren alive, but in this case, I don’t have a way to contact them.

June

June was busy with visiting relatives and a trip to Chicago so there were no posts in June.

July

In July I wrote about the sisters in the Posluszny family, Mary Posluszny Biega, and Elizabeth Posluszny Laçź. One who was well known and the other who disappeared without a trace.

August

I finally made it to the last of the Posluszny children, Walter Bonk, son of Caroline Straub and her second husband John Bonk. I knew all of his children and his grandchildren.

My second post was the result of a stranger’s request on Ancestry looking for “living relatives of Alfred Donroe”. He was my cousin in law’s father and he died in World War II. This person in France is working with citizens of Gouesnou France to create a permanent memorial to the soldiers and civilians who died there. I received a comment on there from my younger cousin, and we had a nice email conversation. He and his wife plan to go to France to see the monument.

September

The last quarter of the year I focused on my maternal grandfather and his family. Their lives were so entwined for many so years, that the first story takes you from Jacob and Katherine’s arrival in the United States through 1916. This was Part 1.

October

Engram Family Part 2 took place from 1916 through the 1930s. I became acquainted with a second cousin a few years ago and he sent a slew of family pictures. I also began searching on Newspapers(dot)com using family member’s names where I found Kitty and Louise playing basketball!

Later in the month, I wrote about Theresa, Katherine, and Louise from the 1930s through their lives. My half aunt Joanne shared photos with me as well as few letters Katherine wrote to Theresa’s daughter Irene. I’m grateful to Joanne for the information and the years of emails back and forth. I saved them all and finally printed them out and put them in order. I was overwhelmed by the amount of information that suddenly made sense!

November

Five posts in November! First up was the lives of Elizabeth and Hannah. Elizabeth had an interesting situation which deserved a post to explain it. It’s amazing what a person can find when they look hard enough, and have help from strangers on Ancestry! Thanks to Newspaper(dot)com again, I discovered a third cousin living about 20 minutes away!

In time for Veterans Day, I shared a post from June 2024 called The Effects of War about my grandfathers in World War I, and uncles in World War II.

Then it was back to the Engram Family with Jacob Sr.’s story. I wish I knew more about him!

My cousin, Brian, messaged me pictures of a letter Jacob Jr. wrote to his sister Theresa. The war was over and he was waiting to go home. When Brian and I got together during Thanksgiving week, we sifted through all the Engram pictures and letters and there were more letters from Jacob to his sisters. They were very interesting to read.

December

I wrapped the year up with a re-post of December 7, 1941, the story of my Uncle Walt during the attack on Pearl Harbor.

I rounded out the Engram family with the final story of my grandfather Jacob Jr. I learned so much about him from my Aunt Joanne’s emails that again, didn’t make sense until it was time to write his story.

And here we are – the end of the year! I’ve signed up again for the 52 Ancestors in 52 Weeks challenge and I will be looking through my family tree for new ancestors to tell you about!

Happy New Year!

My Veterans

In honor of Veterans Day, I’m sharing the story I wrote in June of 2024 for the 52 Ancestors in 52 Weeks challenge. It’s called, The Effects of War. There are links within that story that share the details of their time served.

Beginning with World War I, there was my biological maternal grandfather, Jacob Engram and my paternal grandfather, Charles Jakiela.

My Great Uncle Bronislaw Liro went back to Poland before World War I broke out, fought for the Austrian Army, was captured, and escaped from Siberia.

World War II saw my Uncle Connie and my dad enlist in the Army Air Force and my Uncle Walt and Uncle Mal in the Navy. My Uncle Walt lived through the horror of Pearl Harbor 3 weeks fresh out of Navy radio school.

While cleaning out my aunt’s home, I found a letter from my Great Uncle Antoni written in 1947 describing the aftermath of World War II.

My father in law Harold served in the Korean War as a cook, his brother Ronald as an infantry tank driver, and my step father in law Paul was in the motor pool.

It’s an honor to have these brave men in my family.

Engram Girls Part 2

Two more sisters in this episode…

Elizabeth

I mentioned in my previous story that on June 6, 1917 at 19 years old, Elizabeth married Barney Michkind who was 24 years old. This was only a year after her mother passed away and she is still living at the family Pelham Parkway home. But then, in the 1920 federal census, she is listed as living with her sisters on West 128th Street in Manhattan and Single. Hmmm.

I did a little digging on Barney and found a military record. He enlisted in the military on July 11, 1916 and mustered on July 11, 1917. Remarks on this particular form say:
AWOL August 16/17 to Aug 23/17 incl (something) Aug 28/17. Sent to 10 day confinement at hard labor and forfeit pay for like period. Served overseas for June 30/18 to March 13/19.

So, it seems, they got married and he was leaving.

The next record for Elizabeth is the 1925 New York State census in Bronx New York. She is listed as a wife to Albert Klein, an electrician, and they have a daughter Adeline, who was born in 1922. She gave birth to a son, Robert in 1927.

The 1930 Federal Census tells me they are living in Queens with her brother Jacob, and Albert is working for Jacob on his farm.

In the 1940 Federal Census they are now living in Yonkers, New York and Albert is working as an electrician for an oil burner installation company. Adeline is 17 and Robert is 12. The census also tells me that they were there in 1935 because in the city column it says “same house”.

It makes my curious for the reasons why they left the Bronx where Albert was working as an electrician and move to Queens to a farm for Albert to work as an assistant to his brother in law and then move again to Yonkers and back to his electrician job.

Elizabeth’s father, Jacob Sr., 79 years old, is living with them. The census says he has no job but says “OT” which stands for other work. Joanne wrote, “my grandpa was employed as a groundskeeper at Woodlawn Cemetery, on the border of Bronx and Westchester. I know he lived with my Aunt Betty and Uncle Al at the end of his life…I’d say thru the influence of my dad.” Woodlawn Cemetery by today’s travel is 2.1 miles and 10 minutes from 61 Kettell Avenue Yonkers via Yonkers Avenue. Jacob Sr died in 1944 at the age of 84. His story will come later.

A funny thing happened when Elizabeth and Albert’s family wanted to throw them a 25th wedding anniversary. They had to confess, they were not married! What?! Which begs the question – did Elizabeth ever get a divorce?

I contacted an individual who had Barney in his family tree but didn’t have his marriage to Elizabeth listed. I gave him a copy of their marriage license and he directed me to a court document he found in a search using the name “Elizabeth Mishkind”. It’s filed under “divorce and civil case records” and dated April 9, 1918. Elizabeth is the plaintiff and “in re” the defendant. AI tells me “its use for the defendant indicates that the proceeding was likely uncontested or did not have a formally adversarial (opposing) party. So basically, an uncontested divorce. This person also told me that Barney was a featherweight boxer, competing under the name Barney Williams in his youth. He was married two more times after Elizabeth, in 1922 and in 1937.

Elizabeth and Albert did make their marriage official in 1947, 25 years after the birth of their daughter Adeline! I hope they had that 25th anniversary party.

*Elizabeth, Hannah/Joan, and Louise 1940s Florida*

They all moved again prior to the 1950 federal census but they stayed in Yonkers. By now, both Elizabeth and Albert were 50. He was a trouble shooter for an oil company, likely still an electrician and she was now a nurses aide at a hospital.

*Adeline in her 1940 high school graduation picture*

Their daughter, Adeline, married Frank Rinaldi in January of 1943 and they had a son Frank Jr, 5, and a daughter, Elizabeth, 3, in 1950 and are living with her parents in 1950. He served in the Navy during World War II.

Their son, Robert, married Constance Olsen in Yonkers in May of 1951. The 1950 census for both has them working at a restaurant. She as a waitress, he as a chef so that’s likely where they met. I don’t have any additional information for them.

Unfortunately, in August of 1969, Robert passed away. His obituary says it was after an extended illness, and he died at Memorial Sloan-Kettering, so I’m going to assume it was cancer. Cancer has definitely visited the Engram / Duy family more than I’ve seen in any other part of my family. By this time, 18 years later, he is divorced from Constance, but he does have two children. He served in World War II, lived in Florida for 10 years as a chef in Pompano and Miami, and had returned to Yonkers in recent years.

Elizabeth and Albert continued to live in Yonkers New York. Unfortunately, Elizabeth suffered mental health issues and “spent many years in various state mental institutions” according to my Aunt Joanne.

*Anna Winner Engram, Joanne (5), Jacob Jr., Hannah/Joan, and Elizabeth Engram Klein 1950 Florida*

Albert Klein passed away in October of 1974 after a long illness and he was residing at Rosary Hill Home in Hawthorne, New York. He was 75 years old.

Six months later in May of 1975, Elizabeth passed away following a brief illness. Her obituary says “she had lived in Yonkers hospitals until her husband Albert died last year.” Aunt Joanne shared this with me, “Aunt Betty died from choking on a bone (while she fought off her son-in-law who was trying to help her.)”. What a sad and tragic way for her life to end.

By this time, her sister Katherine (Kitty) was the only sibling living as is her daughter Adeline. Elizabeth also has five grandchildren (although I only have 4), and three great grandchildren! I wonder if they are as interested in their ancestors as I am?

Hannah

Hannah was the youngest of the siblings, born in 1906 and was 10 years old when her mother passed away. She lived with her sisters in the city and went to school. I told you in the Engram Family Part 2, Hannah, now know as Johannah, and later, Joan, was married to Anton Zeiss Jr. when she was 20 years old in 1927. They were living in Pennsauken, New Jersey in the 1930 federal census. Unfortunately, by August 22, 1934, they were divorced in Bronx County.

In the 1940 federal census, she is living at 58 West 56th Street in New York and is working in “magazine makeup” for American Legion Magazine which I think means she was involved in the set up and publishing of the magazine. She was 33 years old and one of 8 lodgers.

However, in September of 1944, she’s in Florida getting married to George G. Woods. They got married 8 days after the death of her father Jacob in Yonkers, New York. But less than 4 years later, Hannah and George are divorced.

Hannah remained in Florida, and is living alone in the 1950 federal census. She is 43 years old and a secretary at a printing company.

In the early 1950s, Hannah was diagnosed with colon cancer. She had a colostomy and Aunt Joanne said it changed her life forever.

*Early 1950s – Anna Engram, Joanne, Jacob Jr, Hannah (around the time of her surgery), and Elizabeth*

She died in December of 1967 but it’s unknown whether she died of cancer or another cause. I can’t find any death record or newspaper notice. At the time of her death she left behind Jacob Jr., Katherine, and Elizabeth. She had no children with her first or second husband.

To catch up on the early stories – Jacob Engram and His Family , Engram Family Part 2, Engram Girls Part 1

Jacob Ingram and His Family

It was a little startling back in January of 2020 to realize the man and family I thought of as my mother’s father and his paternal line, was not correct.

I’ve written about my grandfather, Jacob Engram, Jr., but I thought I’d do some more research and put together a timeline of the whole family. It is going to be long!

Jacob Ingram/Engram

My great grandfather was Jacob Sebastian Ingram. He was born, according to his death certificate on July 7, 1859 in Padew Naraodowa which is a village in Mielec County in south-eastern Poland. At the time of his birth it was in Galicia which was part of Austria due to all the dividing up of Poland.

His birth year ranges from 1859 to 1862. The 1862 dates are reflected on the Ellis Island manifest and census records, so I continue to search a variety of dates for a definitive birth year. Unfortunately the years prior to 1863 are not part of the Geneteka collection. <sigh>.

Even his parents are a mystery. His father’s name is consistently “Sebastian”, however his marriage license lists his mother as Louise (maiden name) Burghardt and his death certificate as Katherine Burghardt. Geneteka records list only Sebastian Ingram and Elzbieta Burghardt in a search. I “know” them because they are the parents of my great-grandfather Ludwig Ingram. Recent information I found said he had a brother John, a brother Frantz (sp), and a sister Juliana.

Jacob left Europe at 24 years old on May 30, 1886 via Hamburg Germany and arrived in New York on June 14th. He traveled in Steerage (“zwischendeck”) aboard the Rhaetia. Records don’t indicate where he was going but wherever he went, he’d be looking for a job as a “schmied” or blacksmith.

At the time of his arrival, Castle Garden, or what we know as Castle Clinton National Monument was the main immigration station for the Port of New York. I was there in June of 2025, and wandered through wondering if any of my ancestors experienced walking through these doors.

Seven years later, on July 23, 1893, Jacob married Katherine Duy. He was 31 years old and she was 28.

*marriage license Jacob and Katherine 1893*

Katherine Duy Ingram/Engram

Katherine was born on August 9, 1965 in Padew as well. Katherine was the 6th born to Johann Jacob Duy and Maria Teresa (maiden name) Duy. According to the 1910 Federal census, she arrived in the United States in 1893 when she was 28 years old. A quick look at a census record for her sister, Barbara, born in 1869, shows she immigrated in 1893, so it could be possible they came together. But that would mean she arrived in the US and almost immediately married Jacob. The 1915 New York State census lists her arrival year as 1887, when she was 22. Another question mark!

Family stories say she had a “withered” arm. The few photos of her don’t show both arms so it’s not known which one or how damaged it was.

Other family members who immigrated included her parents Johann and Theresa and Philip born in 1875 who immigrated with them in 1904. On arrival, they moved to West Springfield Massachusetts. Wilhelm (b. 1867) immigrated and lived in Greenwich Connecticut. Barbara, mentioned above, immigrated in 1893 and lived in Astoria New York. Margaretha (b. 1872) immigrated and lived in South Hadley Massachusetts. One son, Jacob (b. 1858) remained in Austria.

Engram Children Births

More than nine months, but less than a year later, Jacob and Katherine’s first child, a daughter, Barbara, was born on April 27, 1894. Barbara was known as Theresa or Tess and the only indication her name was Barbara is this birth record. Her death certificate says Theresa B.

*Birth record for Barbara (Theresa) Ingram*

14 months later, on July 11, 1895, Katherine gave birth to Jacob Jr. This is the first time I see the spelling of their last name to be ENGRAM and that’s what it remained moving forward.

13 months later on August 19, 1896, Katherine gives birth to her second son, Louis.

Another year, another baby! Second daughter Katherine is born on March 2, 1898. Jacob and Katherine have four children under the age of 4. Whew! Notice these last 2 birth records do not have a first name – maybe they were still deciding.

Dare I say it? Another daughter, Elizabeth was born on November 1, 1899. I don’t have a copy of her birth record, but I trust the family member who has the information in her family tree. This is Jacob and Katherine’s fifth child and 3rd daughter.

On April 19, 1900, Louis died from Acute Meningitis at 3 years and 9 months old. This left Jacob Jr and three sisters.

In 1901, daughter Louise is born. Her name is either a tribute to Louis or to Jacob’s mother Louise (if that was her name!).

Memories written by Jacob and Katherine’s daughter Katherine in 1980, mention a brother who died in infancy. The gap between Louise and Hannah would likely be when it happened but there is not record found to confirm the birth or death.

After a space of five years, the last daughter Hannah is born on July 9, 1906.

Where They Lived 1893-1916

When Jacob and Katherine got married, Jacob was living at 306 W. 69th Street in New York and Katherine was living at 233 W. 80th Street.

1893-1894: After they were married, they continued to live at 306 W. 69th Street and Jacob was still working as a blacksmith. They were living here when Barbara was born.

Per google, the Upper West Side of New York City was a growing, but not yet completely developed, residential neighborhood. 306 West 69th Street and 233 West 80th Street would have been a walk-up tenement or a brownstone rowhouse, likely housing recent immigrants and working-class families who were moving to the area from more crowded parts of the city.

1895: They are now living in Westchester and he is a farmer. You’ll see Westchester was a town in Westchester County New York. In 1895 it was transferred to the City and County of New York, in 1898, it and other areas formed the Borough of the Bronx, and finally in January 1914, the Bronx was split off from New York County and it became Bronx County. This will the area where Jacob continues to farm.

1896-1900: They are living at Ferris Lane but it alternatives between simply Westchester and Union Port, New York City. Union Port appears to have been a village or neighborhood of Westchester. I found a video that talks about the lost villages of the Bronx and took a screen shot when I saw Ferris. Since he is a gardener, perhaps Ferris is the area where he worked and lived.

1906: They are now living on Williamsbridge Road in Westchester, New York City.

My initial thoughts of this area were they must be very rural but research shows me that all of the small towns in the Bronx were rapidly filling up with New Yorkers moving out of the city looking for a plot of their own.

1910: The federal census shows they are living in the Bronx Borough, part of New York City. Wickham Avenue to Astor Estate is the street listing. AI says, “In 1910, the area of the Bronx between Wickham Avenue and the former Astor Estate was rapidly developing from a semi-rural landscape into a residential neighborhood. Jacob, 48, is listed as a Gardener in the farm industry and “working on own account”. Katherine, 44, and the children “Tessie 16, Jacob 14, Kate 12, Elizabeth 10, Louise 8, and Hanna 3” are all at home and I assume attending school.

1915: The state census lists the family at Pelham Parkway in the Bronx County. Jacob the father (54), and Jacob the son (19) were farming. Katherine the mother (49), “Thresia” (21), and Katherine 17I did house work, and Elizabeth (15), Louise (13), and Hannah (9) were in school.

You can see Pelham Parkway as they would have known it on the right, and the present day Pelham Parkway.

During this time period, Katherine’s parents, Johann and Theresa Duy would come and visit. They lived in Longmeadow Massachusetts, but they had Katherine, Barbara, and William in the Connecticut/New York area. The following story comes from their daughter Katherine’s 1980 written memories to her sister Theresa’s (born Barbara) daughter Irene:
My mother’s mother and father (my grandparents) and Uncle Philip were the last members to come to America. I remember my mother telling us how terrible the ocean voyage was and they almost died. And I also remember how my mother longed to see her parents and grieved she would never see them again. They used to come and stay with us for periods at a time and when they left to go back to their eldest daughter’s in Longmeadow Massachusetts…they would cling to each other and it was almost impossible to tear them apart. And they always grieved for the brother and sister who remained in Austria. The family bond was very strong.

Unfortunately, life with Jacob was not always pleasant as he was an alcoholic. Stories passed down mention Katherine leaving Jacob a few times. She would travel to her brother William’s home in Greenwich Connecticut. While away, she would take in laundry. She returned each time because she was pregnant.

October 27, 1916, Katherine Duy Engram passed away after a two year battle with breast cancer. She left behind Jacob and seven children ranging from 22 to 10.

In daughter Katherine’s 1980 memories, she shared this with her niece Irene. Katherine was 18 when her mother died:
”It will be 64 years on the 27th of October 1980 since my mother passed away. She was very, very sick with cancer for 2 years before she died. I stayed on the farm and kept house for the family for 2 years and because of unbearable, alcoholic conditions, we left our father. Your mother (Theresa) was either in nursing training or already doing nursing duty during that time. She always wanted to be a nurse.
I know my mother would be very proud if she came back today and saw the family she created, but I am sure she watched over us and prayed for us and still does. From time to time I wake up thinking of her and recall the bitter, hard struggle she had and can’t go back to sleep for wishing I could take her in my arms and hold her close. Children never know the sacrifices their mother’s make for them. Your heritage is a beautiful one Irene.”

After Katherine died, Jacob Jr. enlisted for World War I and the girls all moved to New York in the care of Theresa. In my next post, I’ll pick up from here.

Walter John Bonk

Walter Bonk (aka Bak or Bunk) was the 13th born and 8th living child of Carolina Straub. His father was John Bonk (Bak), whom she married in 1888 after the death of her first husband Joseph Posluszny in 1887. Carolina gave birth to a baby girl in 1899 who died at birth. Walter was born in Dzikowiec in the Galicia region of Poland on August 29, 1903 when Carolina was 48 years old.

Walter was a month shy of four years old when he made the trip to the United States with his mother, father, and half sister Elizabeth. The Passenger List indicates that his father had traveled to the United States in the past in 1901 and 1906 to Perth Amboy possibly to work and get things settled for them all to come over.

*Walter standing on right in front of mother Carolina late 1907 his father is standing 4th from left*

In 1910, John, Carolina, and Walter are living at 23a Parker Street in Perth Amboy, New Jersey. Although Elizabeth would have been only 14, she is not listed as living with them. Perhaps she was working as a live in maid somewhere. During this time period, Walter was attending school and could speak English.

The next time I find Walter, he is 17 years old in the 1920 United States Federal Census. The family has moved to Wallingford Connecticut and his parents owned 30 Geneva Avenue. They are joined by his half-sister Elizabeth, her husband Joseph Łaçź, their two young sons, his half-cousin John Posluchny (spelled phonetically in the census!), and a border, John Ivaninski. It was a full house! The two boarders work at the hardware factory, his father works as a press dropper at the silverware factory, Joseph a packer there, and Walter at age 17, is no longer attending school and is an electrician at the factory.

Only two years later, Walter, Caroline, and John Bonk were now living at 24 East Street in Wallingford. This was one minute walk from the location of the market owned by Elizabeth and her husband Joseph Łaçź and it is a short walk from Clifton Street where his half brother Konrad (my grandfather) and his family will move to in 1925. He is 19 years old.

In March of 1925, his mother Caroline passes away of stomach cancer.

On June 23, 1925, Walter married Beatrice Kasprzycki of New Haven. She was born on September 13, 1905, the fourth of nine children of John Kasprzycki and Anna Tarnowski of Meriden. The family moved to New Haven in 1917 when her father left International Silver for a job at the American Windshield Corporation.

*Walter Bonk and Beatrice Kasprzycki 23 June 1925*

Just over a year later, Walt and Bea’s first daughter Ann Carolyn Bonk was born on July 25, 1926.

Walter, Bea, and Ann lived at 24 East Street in Wallingford with his father, John. This was a 2 family house and I think they must have lived with him based on the listings in the Streets section of the annual directory.

This following information came from a phone conversation I had with their daughter Ann in the early 2000s:

John, Walter’s father, 55 years old at the time, met Viola Weston, a 50 year old widow and they got married. Viola had 23 and 21 year old sons, and an 18 year old daughter who came along with her to live at 24 East Street. So Walter and his family moved to New Haven, close to Bea’s family.

Walter and Bea had another daughter, Dolores LaVerne born in 1931, and another, Joan Beverly in 1933, and their son Henry in 1937.

Walter and his family remained in New Haven until John died in 1933. Ann said they moved back to Wallingford and lived in one of the apartments and Viola, based on a provision in John’s will, continued to live in the other apartment until her death in 1937.

Walter went to work as an electrician for the Wallingford Steel Mill which then became Allegheny-Ludlum Steel and worked there for his entire career.

Walter also became involved in Wallingford politics in 1944 when he was named as an alternate delegate to the state Republican Party convention as well as part of the republican town committee. He continued on for many years and he also served as the Wallingford Assessor and a second selectman.

We would see Uncle Walt and Aunt Bea once a year at the annual Fourth of July family picnic hosted by Aunt Judy and Uncle Mal and Auntie Irene and Uncle Lou. Judy and Lou were my mother’s older siblings.

Uncle Walt and Aunt Bea continued to live in their home at 24 East Street until age caught up to them. They both resided at the Skyview Nursing Home where he passed away in August 1998 at the age of 94 and she in February of 2003 at the age of 97. They had been married for 73 years.

*Gram (front), Aunt Bea, Mom, Aunt Tootsie abt. 1964*

Their children, Ann, LaVerne, Joan, and Henry were my mother’s half first cousins. But if you’ve read about her being born story, technically they’re not related at all?

*Postcard from Ann Bonk to my mom in 1936*

My mother and Ann were 4 years apart but the Poslusznys, Bonks, and Biegas, all lived within a block or two of each other. My mom was friends with all the girls throughout her life. We may not have seen them frequently, but we knew of them all because of my mother.

Ann’s postcard sent from Middletown when she was 10 and my mother 14 says:
Dear Betty,
I am having a swell time. I miss you a lot, I miss going walking on Sunday with you. Please tell the rest of the family I was asking for them.
Your pest, Ann C. Bonk

Ann married Floyd Monroe of East Haven and they had three daughters and 4 sons. They lived for many years in Vermont and we would see them once a year at the annual Fourth of July picnic! After Floyd passed away in 1985, Ann moved back to Connecticut and became a teacher at the Wallingford Community Day Care where she was known as Miss Ann. Something I didn’t know about her until my research was she was a graduate of Yale University School of Music. Prior to that she studied piano and organ with various teachers including a professor at Yale. For two years prior to college she was the organist at St. Peter and Paul Church in Wallingford. Ann passed away in 2011.

Laverne married Ed Dziubinski and lived in Branford. They had 2 children and Ed passed away some years ago and she has since remarried.

*Laverne with Auntie Ann, Aunt Bea, and Joan (back right)*

Joan married Carl Focareto of Berlin Connecticut. He was a loud, gregarious individual and I don’t mean loud in a bad way! “Knock-out” was his nickname. I don’t know why, and it just came to me! They were married in 1954 and they had 2 children who we knew fairly well because they went to the “other” high school in Wallingford. Their daughter, Beverly, married someone from “our” high school who was good friends with one of my brothers in law, so we would see them at parties and softball games. Their son, Peter, lives a few blocks away from us.

Carl and my dad were golfing buddies. When Carl died in 1998, it hit my dad pretty hard. As a tribute to him, dad had the florist make up an arrangement that was a putting green. I wish I still had the picture of it. It was probably something they had never done before! Joan still lives in Wallingford.

My sisters and I didn’t know Henry and his family. I don’t know why. Maybe because he was born in 1937 when my mother was 15, and he was a boy?

Hank as he was known was involved in baseball and lacrosse growing up. He graduated from Tufts University and was a chemist and inventor with 34 scientific patents. He also served in the Army in South Korea. He had his wife had 2 daughters. Sadly, Hank passed away after a long battle from MS in 2021 at the age of 83.

My Behme cousins are far more familiar with Hank and his family most likely because their mother, Judy Posluszny Behme, was 2 years younger than Hank and they might have gone to Holy Trinity together. Being that close in age, they likely had their children in the same range and they too, would have been in school together. I just remember the Behme family heading off to the Bonks house during the holidays and I didn’t quite understand why we didn’t!

When I put these stories together I see so many characteristics within my family today. The scientists and musicians, the cooks and bakers, and overall smarty-pantses in the family! There’s also the “get involved in your town” and take care of people whether their friends or strangers. This is the DNA we carry within us.

As cousin Ann Bonk’s obituary said:
In memory of Ann and how she lived her life, we ask that you honor her by a simple act of kindness.

Angel Antonia

She died in the early morning hours of April 2, 1927. Alone in her hospital room while her husband and five children slept in their nearby apartment.

She knew something was wrong the previous afternoon. She sent her 12 year old son for the midwife and then went to the hospital.

“She’ll be fine” is what they told her husband when he left the hospital that evening, only to be alerted by the grocer with the neighborhood telephone.

Her obituary said, “She was very well and favorably known to a large circle of friends among the Polish residents of the town”. Small comfort for her family.

She was buried in St. Thomas Cemetery in Southington on April 4th. Her husband carved a wooden cross for her grave and mourned her death until his in 1935.

Years later, her son, Edward, who, at her request, stayed home from school that day, had a headstone made for his mother.

*St. Thomas Cemetery, Southington CT, Section 12*

Her husband was never the same. Two of the younger children went to an uncle in Massachusetts and the youngest, to his godmother in town. When he and his older sons found a permanent place to live in Wallingford, he brought everyone back together. But how many months had gone by suddenly without a mother and then a father?

I try to imagine what their lives, and ours, would have been like if she lived long enough to watch her children grow up and to know her grandchildren. Would we call her Babcia? Would she teach us to speak Polish? Would we tease her about being so short and would my boy cousins rest their arms on the top of her head trying to be funny. Who would be her favorite child? Who would be her favorite grandchild?

We’ll never know.

Time and Memory

Reflections on the anniversary of my father’s passing

Friday, March 28th, marked the 15th anniversary of my dad’s death in 2010. In February of that year, after a month of turmoil for us all, he was finally settled into the nursing home after leaving his assisted living with a short stay in the hospital. He’d begun attending the events and, as always, enjoyed the music. My sister Gail said she’d had a nice visit with him, taking him for a walk around the grounds and spending time sitting and talking outside.

It was a Sunday, when I received the call from the nursing home to tell me he had passed away. He was sitting in bed eating breakfast when someone walked by, and when they walked by again, he was slumped over. Just like that. Gail and I contacted the funeral home then headed there and sat with him for a while. It was Palm Sunday and the home left a frond in his room that I took and have in a box with my parents personal belongings.

I’ve written more than once about my mother’s eight week journey from diagnosis to death with Glioblastoma. My dad’s death occurred one week prior to the 23rd anniversary of my mother’s death.

After my mother died, my father carried on. He was 63 and still working in the facilities department at Gaylord Hospital in town. He really loved that job! He was such a people person, he was an awesome painter and wall-paperer, my sister Gail worked there, and the Farms Country Club was next door so he’d look for golf balls during lunch or hit some balls.

He loved “his girls”, his grandkids, golfing, and riding his bike. During my 8 years in California, he visited both with my sisters and by himself and I never had to entertain him. He’d take off for the day on my bike or head to the golf course in town.

I won’t go through the litany of health ailments starting with his 1996 knee replacement, but they were enough to slow him down and significant enough that he was not able to live on his own after 2000. After that, it felt like from late January until April, he, and we, were dealing with one health issue or another.

During this week every year, I think about that. I’ve written about my dad’s childhood, how his mother died when he was turning 3 and his father died the month before his 11th birthday. He and his older siblings were then raised by his 12 years older brother.

What do I think about? I think that he didn’t want to leave his girls alone. I think that he wanted to be with us, to be our dad for as long as he could even if that meant fighting through whatever pain he had. I may sound crazy, but I think after 22 years and 51 weeks my mother said, “Honey, they’re going to be fine, come home” and with that, he went home.

January 31st

January 31st. 38 years ago, on January 31st, 1987, my mother was diagnosed with brain cancer. Glioblastoma Multiform. It was not a question of IF she would die, but WHEN. It was so invasive throughout her brain, there was nothing they could do for her.

I’ve written about our journey with her illness here and here. Boy, did it suck. Her decline was so rapid, it was like she let out a sigh of relief from getting found out. I felt so fecking helpless. Maybe that’s why I always cajole my family members with a “you’re fine, you’re fine!” Like I can will their pain or illness out of them because I couldn’t do it for her.

So many years later, I see myself standing at the copier at work hearing my name as I’m paged for a phone call. I hear Gail saying, “I’ll always think of this when I pay my taxes”. I see me sitting with my sisters in the hospital cafeteria discussing what she’ll wear for her funeral. Weeks later, trying to force her to eat because the visiting nurse said when she stops, the end will only be a few weeks (it was). I went out that afternoon for the St. Patricks Day parade in New Haven and tied.one.on. We knew it wouldn’t be long.

She died 8 weeks after her diagnosis. Every year between January 31st and April 4th, I remember what it felt like to see her slip away.

John Posluszny

I told you about John Posluszny’s death and burial here but I thought you might enjoy hearing about his life and family.

John was born in March 1880 and was the eldest of the children of Caroline Straub and Joseph Posluszny.

He arrived in the United States in 1899 at the age of 19 and spent most of his life in the Newark, New Jersey area. I have no ship manifest for his arrival, but used the year recorded on the federal census reports.

Both the 1905 New York State census and the Yonkers city directory lists John living in Yonkers on Washington Street as a boarder in a household and working as a hatter (the family occupation).

Something puzzles me though. Jumping ahead a few years, the 1910 Federal Census lists a son John, 7 years old, which means he was born about 1903 and in the United States. The 1905 census doesn’t include a child or a wife but you’ll see further down this post, a marriage license says his first wife died. The Posluszny Family portrait was taken about 1907 based on the appearance of young John (front row left) and young Walter (front row right). I think the picture of John and his son and the picture of the four brothers was taken at about the same time.

*John Posluszny and his son John abt. 4 years old*

He married Stefania Mariasz in March in 1908. She immigrated in December of 1907 with her sister Karolina and they were heading to their cousin, Johann Straub on Jefferson Street in Yonkers. Johann Straub and Jefferson Street are names that have popped up regularly for Posluszny family members when they arrived in the United States. The marriage license says John was married before and his wife had died. I have no record for that and no birth record for John Jr.

*John and Stefania’s marriage license 1908*

There is another mystery – “they” had a daughter Martha, who was born in Austria in 1907 and came to the United States in February of 1909! I’m not sure who her parents really were. Martha arrived with John Posluszny’s cousin Katarzyna Burek, but I don’t recognize that name. Is it possible that Stefania had her out of wedlock in 1907? Illegitimate children were not uncommon according to the birth records I’ve been poring over.

By the 1910 census, we find John and his family in Newark New Jersey. This census assumes that Stefania gave birth to both John and Martha (2 children born, 2 children living). They were renters and shared their home with Stefania’s sisters Karolina and Julia. Julia is listed as being married for 8 years and immigrated in 1903 with a final destination of her husband Josef Dosedla. I don’t know what happened to him but by 1914, she was married to Jacob Vervliet in New Jersey.

John and Stefania had a son, Stanley born in August of 1918, nine years after Martha and 15 years after John.

*Stanley Posluszny born 1918 – approx. 1921*

In 1920, John, Stefania, Martha (13), and Stanley (1-1/2) are living in Irvington, a town in Essex County, New Jersey. John and Martha are both naturalized citizens and John is still working as a hatter. The sister in laws have moved on and so has the oldest son John. I found him living in Wallingford Connecticut with his grandparents, Caroline and Jon Bonk and working at Wallingford Silversmith.

By 1930, John is a restaurant owner and also owns a multi-family home at 617 18th Avenue in Newark. His restaurant / saloon was at 672 South 19th Street which appears to be the same building, with the entrance around the corner. I took the 2007 pictures from Google Maps because in 2023, the building is in a terrible state of disrepair!

Martha was married at 22 in 1928 to Leslie Theobald, a police officer for Newark. They had a daughter, Dolores and they were divorced in 1941. Their daughter, Dolores married Theodore Kozlowsky in 1951 and they had three children. I’m still researching to add them to the family tree.

*Divorce notice for Martha and Leslie – note the item underneath. Dr. Gilbreth is the mother of the real “Cheaper by the Dozen” family!*

I have not been able to find any information on John Jr. after the 1920 census in Wallingford. There are some possible leads but nothing that confirms to me that’s my John.

Stanley was easier to find possibly because he was born in the late 1910s. He graduated from West Side High School in Newark and then from Northeastern University in Boston with a bachelor’s in science degree. He would later become a dentist. But first up was World War II.

He registered in 1940 while he was a student at Northeastern. On the form, he spelled his last name “Poslushny” unlike our “Posluszny”. This picture is signed “Stan Post” which some of the male family members adopted permanently but Stanley did not.

He enlisted in the Marines in March of 1942. This was only a month after his father died as a result of a car accident. In November of that year, he completed pre-flight training and was sent to the Naval Reserve aviation base in Squantum, Massachusetts which was in the city of Quincy.

From there he headed to Pensacola Florida where he was commissioned a second Lieutenant in the Marines Corps Reserve after completing the flight training course. He was designated a naval aviator and assigned to the Navy Air Operational Training Center in San Diego California.

I was surprised to find this article for the same event in my local Connecticut newspaper archives and wondered why. Then I realized his sister Martha, and probably her daughter Dolores were living in Wallingford! 105 Ward Street a multi-family home and part of Steinke’s Market. The original market was owned by Joseph Laçz and his wife Elizabeth Posluszny (John’s sister). It was then purchased by Mary Posluszny Biega and her husband and at some point purchased (?) by their daughter Mary and her husband Otto Steinke. Whew. Remember, this was shortly after Martha and her husband Leslie Theobald were divorced in New Jersey. Family taking care of family again.

In 1945 Stanley was flying in the Pacific Theater and this event was recorded in the Newark Evening News.

The military rolls for Stanley show him stationed from Virginia to San Francisco and ending out his career as a captain.

He ended up back in the New Jersey/New York area and I believe he was married, had three sons, and was then divorced. I don’t know when he continued his schooling to become a dentist. Interesting note – his aunt Mary Posluszny Biega also had a son, Stanley G. and he became a dentist here in Connecticut.

He headed out to Arizona in 1955, was married in 1959, and had a daughter. I found her name on Ancestry in 2012. We have corresponded and discovered immediately that we were family. We became a DNA match a few years ago and since we have shared matches, I have new names to check on.

Stanley passed away in 1984 when she was only 21, not unlike he and his father. She told me that her father hated the cold and hated funerals and wanted to be cremated but her Italian-born mother refused and had him buried. How ironic that the same thing happened to father and son.

*Obituary and headstone for Stanley J. Posluszny*

I hope you enjoyed this biography of John Posluszny and his family!

Favorite Photo

The Week 2 Topic for 52 Ancestors in 52 Weeks is “Favorite Photo”.

This photo started me on my Ancestry Journey:

My mother’s oldest sister, Antoinette, known as Toots and Tootsie, was the family picture keeper. When I visited her in her little one room apartment, she would bring out the photos and tell me about the people in the photos. Some of the stories didn’t match the previous ones, but it was fun to just sit and listen to her. When she moved to a nursing home, my cousin Judy had the pictures and when she passed away, her husband gave them to me.

This photo is of the entire Posluszny Family, the maternal side of my family tree. In the front row is John Posluszny and his son John, Ann Straub Posluszny with her daughter Ann, Mary Posluszny (later to become Mary Biega), Caroline Straub Posluszny (at this time Bonk) and her son Walter, Elizabeth Posluszny (later to become Elizabeth Laçz). The back row is Joseph Posluszny, husband of Ann, Frank Posluszny, Charles Posluszny, John Bonk (the men’s stepfather and Caroline’s second husband, Walter’s father), Julianna Ingram Posluszny, and Conrad Posluszny (my grandmother and grandfather).

I have stared at this photo for so many years, just looking at the faces and wondering about them and their lives in Wildenthal (now Dzikowiec) before coming to the United States.

I marvel at the handsomeness of my grandfather (ok, he’s not really, but I am still related because he and my grandmother were 2nd or 3rd cousins), and I can’t get over the resemblance of Mary Posluszny Biega to my cousin Ann who has passed away.

I have individual pictures of a few of them, and some wedding photos that I treasure, but this photo is my favorite. It keeps me digging.