Meeker OK – It's All About Family

My father in law, known by all as Harold, was born on November 4, 1929 in Muskogee, Oklahoma, the first born son, to Opal Deane Menser and Cletus Harold Benson.

The earliest record I find for Harold is the 1930 Federal Census. He and his mother Opal were living in Shawnee, Oklahoma with her sister, Zera and husband John Jeffreys, and their five children ages 12 to 3. In the same census, his father, Cletus, while working as a mechanic, was living in Shawnee with his sister, Sylvia Reville, her husband Jack, and their son Bedford, as well as a lodger. I would not be surprised if his parents were separated at this time.

Cletus and Opal got back together at some time after this census because their son Ronald Deane was born on February 17, 1932 in Muskogee when Harold was 2 years and a few months old.

That reunion didn’t last very long because on July 16, 1938, Opal married George Ray Shelton. George was previously married in December of 1931 and divorced in November of 1934.

After they were married, George’s employment with the Chicago, Rock Island, and Pacific Railroad took him from away from home. He was also employed by Phillips Petroleum in 1940 and was living in Phillips, Texas. This employment information is on his World War II draft card and on the 1940 census.

In the 1940 Federal Census, Opal, George, and Harold, who is 10 years old, were living in Shawnee at 403 South Pennsylvania Street. But as mentioned above, George is living in Texas and working for Phillips Petroleum. Younger brother Ronald, who would be 8 years old is not listed.

If you read my story about Harold’s wife, Wanda Armstrong, you might remember they were married in February of 1949 when Wanda was a senior in high school and Harold was in the Army Air Force and stationed at Lackland Air Force Base in Texas. It looks like Harold and Wanda met at Meeker high school when Harold enrolled as a junior in March of 1947. According to the 1950 census, however, his schooling ended here.

Harold and Wanda were living in Berkeley, California with Opal, George, and Ronald during the 1950 Federal Census when the information was collected in April of that year. Harold worked with George as an apprentice pipe fitter for the Steam Railway Company, where George was a Machinist Inspector.

But, by September of that year, Harold and Wanda were once again in Meeker and Wanda gave birth to their daughter Linda in December of 1950.

There is no census, or any town directories to tell me what Harold did for a living after moving back to Oklahoma. But I found a newspaper article for May 1953 in the Shawnee News-Star. An Assembly of God group attended a young people’s rally at the Sparks Assembly of God church. Sparks is about 24 miles north of Shawnee. A quartet comprised of 4 people, including Harold Benson sang “Come Unto Me”. I recall hearing him sing and he had a nice voice.

In October of 1953, a group of Assembly of God members traveled again to Sparks when one of their members, Harold Benson, preached and the quartet sang a song. One of the members of the quartet, and also a preacher, was James Odell, his cousin Venita’s husband. Venita’s mother, Zenas, aka Mrs. Lester Curtis, and his mother, Opal were sister and whenever Opal traveled back to Oklahoma, their names were included in the newspaper articles announcing their visits.

With this knowledge of Harold’s occupation, this photo takes on new significance. Wanda is being baptized and that is Harold standing off to the right. The man baptizing her is likely the Reverend C.W. (Charley Washington) Decker of the Assembly of God Church. I wish besides the name on the back of the photo, someone wrote the year it was taken, but if it was 1953 or 1954, Wanda was 23 and Harold, 25.

*Back of photo: Harold and Wanda date unknown*

In 1954, there were a few more articles mentioning Assembly of God services with Harold giving a sermon but after December of 1954, although C.W. Decker is still the Reverend, there was no mention of Harold or James Odell.

I know that by March of 1958, Harold, Wanda, and Linda were back in California and living at 5764 Vicente Street in Oakland when Mark (my husband) was born. Through some outside the box research, I discovered Opal and George were living in the other side of the duplex at 5766.

*Directory listing for George and Opal in 1957*

*5764 and 5766 St. Vicente Street Oakland*

In the last two years of the 1950s, the family would be at two different addresses. The first, at 1700 41st Avenue in Oakland was the address put on Mark’s immunization record book. The second, at 1417 46th Avenue, is the updated address on the book.

Mark’s birth certificate listed Harold’s occupation as a bus driver in public transportation which in this case was AC (Alameda County) Transit. This was a good job that could become a lifelong career.

But then, Harold decided to buy a gas station in Calistoga! In January of 1961, he purchased the Shell Station at 1020 Foothill, on the corner of Lincoln and Foothill in Calistoga California from the previous long-time owner, Ray Oxford. Harold had no experience with automobiles or running a business.

I located the family in the Napa directory for 1961 and found them living at 1328 Berry in Calistoga. It was a short distance from the gas station. My husband was 3 years old at this time and so the picture of the house didn’t bring up any memories of that time period.

Things didn’t work out for Harold and the gas station and in November of 1961, he sold the station back to The Shell Corporation. A few weeks later, Shell sold the station back to the previous owner Ray Oxford.

Over the years, the gas station survived floods, fires, and leaking underground storage. In 2014, two men who had a vision, purchased and turned the old gas station into the Tank Garage Winery. Friends of ours, who knew the gas station story, were in Calistoga and went to the winery. They brought Mark a shirt from their visit there.

As I mentioned in Wanda’s story, I believe this was the beginning of the end of their marriage. Wanda filed for divorce in 1962, and was remarried to Paul Reinhart in February of 1963. Given that California required a year between divorce and marriage, the filing definitely happened in January of February.

After the divorce, Harold became a weekend father. Harold taught Mark to fish and they enjoyed spending time through the years fishing together. “A lot of fishing”, Mark said. He also recalls spending a lot of time with him in San Francisco visiting museums or spending time at the wharf.

Harold went back to work as a bus driver for AC Transit and lived in San Leandro area. He worked his way up through the years to instructor and supervisor until his retirement.

He also remarried. Her name was Marilyn but that’s all Mark can remember. I can’t find any marriage or divorce records for Harold and Marilyn. But, in October of 1976, Harold married Margaret McCarthy. They were married for four years, getting divorced in 1980.

He met his fourth wife, Danielle Heath, while they were both working for AC Transit and they were married in June of 1981.

When I first met Harold and Danielle in 1987, they were living in San Leandro and we were in Castro Valley so we got together for dinners and holidays. We moved up north to Healdsburg and we didn’t see them as often but they would drive their motor home up and spend a weekend, especially after Cody was born.

Harold retired from AC Transit and they moved to a houseboat in Brentwood on the Delta. It was small for sure, but they both loved it, and when we visited, we spent time out on the boat on miles of Delta waterway.

A funny story about a stay there – it was Christmas Eve and I was 2 months pregnant with Cody. We drove down from Healdsburg to visit and planned to leave early the next day to continue on to Twain Harte to spend time with Wanda and Paul. After dinner on the houseboat, Mark and I stayed in their motor home parked on top of a levee, and it is always windy out there in the Delta. That motorhome moved so much we were afraid we were going to tip over! We got up, packed our stuff, left a note and got out of there around 3am! We literally had tumbleweeds bouncing up and over our SUV as we drove through the country roads. We laughed then and still laugh about it today. We pulled in to Twain Harte around 5 am, with Harold and Danielle not even knowing we were gone.

*Harold doing one of his favorite things*

In the mid-1990s, they moved to Port Orchard, Washington, just one hour north of Opal and George, and Ronald and his family. We were able to visit them one or two times after they moved there.

Harold, had some health complications and Mark made a trip out to visit with him and his Uncle Ronald in November of 2005. Thankfully he made the trip because Harold passed away the following month.

One of my fondest memories of Harold is when I went into labor with Cody, Harold came to the hospital to wait it out with Mark. He sat in the nurses station all night long. He might have come in to check on me, I don’t remember. Likely he waited for Mark or the nurses to come out with news. After I delivered Cody by c-section the next morning, he went home.

He came to visit us after we moved to Connecticut, once on his own and another time with Opal. He and my father would have very competitive games of Cribbage!

We also shared a love of family history. When I saw him for my last time in November of 2001, we talked about his family and he shared a picture of his grandmother and her four sisters and told me stories that had been passed down to him. He also enjoyed talking about history in general, was well-versed on subjects, and that’s probably where his son gets his interest as well.

It is hard to believe he’ll be gone 21 years this Christmas. He was a kind man and he clearly loved his son. He always made an effort to visit us no matter where we lived and I am grateful that I got to know him.

As I explore my husband Mark’s side of the family, I’m beginning with his mother, Wanda Lea Armstrong.

Wanda was born September 19, 1931 in Meeker Oklahoma. Meeker was established in 1903 and is at the intersection of Highway 18 and US highway 62. But why does the federal census through the years say South Wichita township and not Meeker? The best I can figure out is the township is a 6 mile x 6 mile grid square of land established during the original land surveys of the Oklahoma Territory and the town of Meeker is within the northern portion of the grid square. So they lived within the township but not specifically Meeker, but the township shares the same zip code and relies on the town for mail delivery.

Wanda was the second born and second daughter of Joseph “Jack” Armstrong and Cleo Vergie Gallaway. her sister Willie Marie was fifteen months older. I have no pictures of Wanda or her sister when they were children but I have found the typical newspaper articles telling of family gatherings with the Armstrong family and friends. They had some nice bonding time together because the next sibling doesn’t arrive until 6-1/2 years later.

In April of 1937, Wanda’s brother Johnny was born. In 1943, another brother, Charles, was born. Finally in 1948, her sister Kathryn was born. What a span! Willie Marie got married in 1948 and Wanda was in her senior year of high school by the time their last sibling was born.

In my opinion, Wanda was a very pretty girl and I think her fellow students thought so too! An article from the Chandler News in 1946, says Wanda, as a Freshman, was crowned “Basketball Queen”. Four contestants were nominated by the pep squad and basketball team. Votes were a penny a piece. Wanda won and she was escorted to her throne and received her crown from the basketball captain Earl Welker.

*Wanda (sophomore) on left dark curly hair*

Wanda also played basketball and was a member and treasurer of the Future Homemakers of Oklahoma Club.

I don’t know when or where Wanda met her future husband, Cletus Harold Benson, Jr. but maybe she caught his eye at the diner where she worked.

Harold, as he was known, was born and raised in Shawnee, Oklahoma, a short 13 miles south of Meeker located in Pottawatomie County. Harold was the son of Opal Dean Menser and Cletus Harold Benson and his story will come at another time.

Wanda and Harold were married in February of 1949 when Wanda was a senior in high school and Harold was in the Air Force and stationed at Lackland Air Force Base in Texas.

Once Wanda finished high school, she joined Harold in San Antonio Texas, about a 7-1/2 hour drive by today’s highways from Meeker. The newspaper documented one visit by Wanda in December of 1949.

After Harold’s discharge from the Air Force, they moved to Berkeley, California and were living with Harold’s mother Opal, his step-father George Shelton, and Harold’s brother Ronald who was 18. Wanda was also 18 and working as a car hop at a drive-in restaurant. According to the census, Opal was the manager and cashier, and Ronald worked at the soda fountain. George and Harold worked for a “steam railway company”, most likely Southern Pacific Railroad where George was a Machinist Inspector and Harold an Apprentice Pipefitter.

There seems to be a bit of travel between the two states because by September of 1950, Wanda and Harold were living in Meeker Oklahoma where their daughter, Linda Darlene was born in December. Then living in California in December of 1951, and back in Meeker in July of 1952.

*Visiting from California in December 1951. Mrs. Curtis is Harold’s aunt*

*Living again in Meeker in July of 1952*

There are no city directories later than 1935 for Shawnee, Oklahoma and none for Meeker, so I’ve continued to rely on newspaper articles. In a 1952 article for a bridal shower, Wanda was one of the hostesses of the event held in Meeker. The bride was employed by the Bank of Meeker and since Wanda worked for various banks in California when they moved there permanently, I’m going to guess she worked with the bride, Miss Wanda Bolt.

The newspaper trail runs cold, but first this newspaper article. Wanda, along with some friends and family members, laced up their sneakers and played a charity basketball game against the Sparks (Oklahoma) Ladies team with proceeds to be given to the Polio Foundation. This was a fun article to find!

There is a blank space of two years before their son, Mark Aaron (my husband), is born in Berkeley California in March of 1958 while they are living in Oakland.

In 1960, Wanda’s younger brother, Charles, 17 years old, moved out to California to live with them.

The family lived in Napa for about a year when Harold bought a Shell Service Station in January of 1961. Wanda got a job at the new Calistoga branch of the Bank of America in April of that year.

By November of 1961, Harold gave up the service station business and sold his “vendee, equipment, and stock-in-trade” to Shell Oil Company. His address in the Notice of Intended Sale I found is listed as 3115 Suter Street in Oakland California. Either by then, or shortly afterwards, Wanda filed for divorce.

By 1962, Linda was 11 years old and Mark was four years old. Wanda worked for Wells Fargo Bank and Mark remembers living in Oakland during this time period. It was while Wanda worked at the bank that she met Paul Reinhart a mechanic and partner at Big 3 Tire and Brake in Oakland. On the weekends, he raced his corvette with the Sports Car Club of America.

They began dating and one year after meeting, they were married in Reno, Nevada on February 9, 1963.

The new family moved to San Leandro when Mark began school. Wanda continued to work in banking and spent many years working for Ford Credit in Pleasanton.

The family continued to visit Oklahoma and now Iowa was included in the travels to visit with Paul’s parents.

*Mr. And Mrs. Reinhart visiting the family in California*

In 1972, Paul and Wanda purchased a small cabin in Twain Harte, a town in the foothills of the Sierras as a weekend getaway. They enjoyed their time there and purchased a larger home a few streets away. Paul and Mark could ride motorcycles through the woods right out of their garage and the canal carrying water for the Tuolumne Water district ran right above their home. It was a great place to walk. They moved there full time around 1993.

*Wanda and Paul at the Cabin in Twain Harte*

I met Wanda in 1987 when I moved to California to live with Mark. Imagine hearing that someone your son met on vacation was moving across the country to live with him! Luckily, we liked each other. We spent many weekends in Twain Harte rocking in the two chairs in her room, talking and watching television. She was a good grandmother to our son, hovering over him feeding him whatever he wanted. She enjoyed shopping and many weekends we would all “head down the hill” to wander through the department stores and the used book store.

She was diagnosed with cancer in March of 1996 and passed away in October of that year in Twain Harte at the age of 64. A memorial service was held for her in Meeker, Oklahoma on July 1, 1998 (28 years ago as I write this) and her ashes were interred with her parents at the New Salem Cemetery located just outside Meeker. The majority of Armstrong and Gallaway family members are buried there.

Just like my mother, she left us too early.