I sadly didn’t remember the anniversary of Pearl Harbor until I was heading to bed last night.
I wanted to re-share the story of my Uncle, Walter Jakiela and his experience at Pearl Harbor on December 7, 1941. He was 19 years old and 3 weeks out of radio school.
https://nancyb422.com/2024/03/06/living-through-the-day-of-infamy/
Happy Thanksgiving from me to you!
Recently, one of my favorite bloggers wrote about what she is thankful for.
I’ve been thinking the same lately as I leave my house in the morning. It helps to ease my everyday anxiety by getting me to think about something other than what happened in high school or where I’m going to be 10 years from 6 months ago!
It might have something to do with the book I’m currently reading, “Solito” by Javier Zamora. It’s a memoir of his travels in 1999 with a group of 8, originally strangers, led by a coyote from La Herradura, El Salvador, to the United States when he was 9. His parents were already in “LA USA”. Everyone thought the trip was two weeks long which, at the point of my spot in the book, is three months.
It also brings to mind the people in North Carolina who suffered through Hurricane Helene. Many are still living in tents and others, in homes, just recently got potable water. It was such an unexpected weather event that hopefully they will never see again in their lifetimes.
We’re heading over to celebrate Thanksgiving with family of family, people whom we’ve been sharing this holiday for over 20 years, and hopefully there will be 20 plus more to come.
I’m grateful for my family, my home, my health, fresh water, inside plumbing, food readily available, a vehicle to get from place to place, and our business.
I hope you are having a happy and healthy day!
The Week 35 Topic for 52 Ancestors in 52 Weeks is All Mixed Up.
If you’ve ever known twins, if you are a twin, or if you have family members who are twins, you know what I’m talking about.
Through elementary school and beyond we have been mixed up. Our children have turned to “the other one”, and people in grocery stores are embarrassed when they realize we’re not who they think we are, no matter how much we reassure them “it’s ok! Just tell me your name and I’ll tell her you said hello!”
I’m dealing with an All Mixed Up situation as I’m combing through Birth, Marriage, and Death records of my grandfather’s birthplace in Poland. A distant cousin received the records from a researcher and he passed them on to me. I’ve added information to Charles Jakiela’s immediate family including his sibling’s birth records, and his father’s remarriage after his mother died. But the jpg file are out of order of the books so I’ve been flipping back and forth trying to follow the dates. I finally made a list showing the page numbers in the books along with the file number.
My intention is to go through the records and chart the family names, dates, and house numbers to see where the matching parental names are. There are so many Jakielas, Murdzeks, and Pernals, all names I know are part of our ancestry. Then I plan to take names and birth dates and cross reference them to naturalization records and enlistment forms processed in Connecticut because I know there is a Lubatowa connection from looking through them in the past. There is also a Jakiela and Murdzek connection in Pennsylvania that I’d like to finally uncover. It would also be sweet to finally figure out where connect on the family tree!
This kind of research is what I love to do so hopefully it will be fruitful.
The topic for week 34 of 52 Ancestors in 52 Weeks is Member of The Club. I looked at that and thought SWEET! It was a subject I wanted to share.
The Improved Order of Red Men is a national fraternal organization that goes back to 1765 and was one of several patriotic societies founded before the American Revolution. Other groups included The Sons of Liberty and the Sons of St. Tammany. Originally known as Red Men, the members concealed their identities and worked “underground” to help establish freedom and liberty in the early Colonies. After the War of 1812, the name was changed to the Society of Red Men and in 1834 to the Improved Order of Red Men. In Baltimore, Maryland in 1847, the various tribes came together and formed a national organization called the Grand Council of the United States. With the formation of a national organization, the Improved Order of Red Men spread, and within 30 years there were State Great Councils in 21 states with a membership of over 150,000. The order continued to grow and by the mid-1920s there were tribes in 46 states and territories with a membership totalling over one-half million.
The organization believes in:
*Love and Respect for the American Flag
*The American Way of Life
*Keeping alive the customs and legends of a once-vanishing race
*Creating and inspiring a greater love for the United States of America
*Linking our members together in a common bond of Friendship and Love
*Helping those in need with organized charitable programs
The Women’s Auxiliary of the Improved Order of Red Men was The Degree of Pocahontas. It was believed that Pocahontas’ brief life presented a touching and beautiful picture of grace, beauty, and virtue, as well as “constant friendship to the palefaces.” The group patterned itself after the virtues of the original Pocahontas, those virtues of teaching kindness, love, charity, and loyalty to one’s nation. (information from the official website http://www.redmen.org)
The first “tribe” in Connecticut was the Hammanssett No. 1 tribe in New Haven established in 1880. Within 50 years, there were 38 additional tribes of seven thousand members along with the Degree of Pocahontas with several thousand members of its own. The Wallingford men’s tribe was Owenoco and the local women’s tribe Cheyenne Council No. 20.
Notable Connecticut men involved in the group included three Connecticut governors – Raymond Baldwin, Marcus Holcomb, and John Trumbull.
My Aunt Tootsie became involved with this organization in the early 1940s and was very active in it for over 40 years. Until I saw the article below, I didn’t know another aunt, Florence Jakiela, was also part of the group, so that was an interesting find!
In addition to meetings, the Red Men and Pocahontas groups held fundraisers and presentations such as this one from 1955. (Notice the ad about Caplan’s being closed for George Washington’s birthday!)
Tootsie met her first husband Lester Schmitt through the Red Men organization. Lester is 2nd from left in the photo below and I thought he looked a little like Bob Hope in one of his movies. They dated for many years before they married as he lived with and cared for his mother in Torrington and she did the same for my grandmother in Wallingford.
Years after Lester passed away, she married her second husband in 1978. He and his first wife were friends with Tootsie and Lester through the Red Men organization.
It was in the late 1960s that the Degree of Pocahontas decided to create a girls’ group, Silver Cloud Council. It was made up of nieces, granddaughters, and neighborhood friends of the Pocahontas members, and we met one Friday night a month. My mother was likely happy to have us out of the house for that one Friday night!
The Red Men building was located at 50 South Whittlesey Avenue in Wallingford and, at the time, it was incredibly dark and scary. Our meetings were on the second floor and they were very ceremonious. We had to be reminded of the process at every meeting. The parts of those evenings I remember the most were:
1) wanting to watch The Brady Bunch and Partridge Family (no DVR back then!), being annoyed that we couldn’t, and trying to get it tuned in on an old television set there;
2) running around the building with the other girls; creeping up the stairway to the cupola at the top of the building; and
3) sneaking down the basement stairs to peek at the organization’s bar!
In addition to meetings, we marched in parades including our town’s Tercentenary (300 years) parade in 1970. We definitely weren’t thrilled about that!
My sisters and I moved on from the group after 2 years at the most and I don’t have any memories of Aunt Tootsie participating after that. Two of the ladies in the group passed away in 1973 so that would have definitely shrunk the local Pocahontas council.
The Improved Order of Red Men tribe in Wallingford disbanded and the building was sold and now houses a law firm. There are still active tribes in Connecticut and 126 tribes throughout the United States.
The Week 33 topic for 52 Ancestors in 52 Weeks is – My Favorite Discovery. I’ve had a few discoveries over the last 25 years. My favorite discovery has a good side / not-so-good side, but it makes me happy.
The road to this discovery started in 2004, when my cousin Judy Posluszny Behme passed away and her husband brought me all her ancestry paperwork. She and I were working parallel, we didn’t share information or ask questions about what we had. I knew she was also working on it, but not much more!
The papers included email correspondence from someone named Joanne. Judy had sent a letter to Anna Engram, Joanne’s mother. I don’t know whether the letter was ancestry-related or just perhaps a Christmas card to Aunt Tootsie’s list of people. Who knows how long it had been since cards had been sent out but it was a smart idea to use the list for information too!
The top 2 emails are from Joanne to Judy in February 2001, 2 weeks apart, and the bottom one is my email to Joanne in November of 2004.
Joanne responded right away. She still didn’t know who she visited as a young girl but recalled a wedding in Wallingford “of a woman relative who was marrying at ‘mid-age'” and “this may have been a cousin? to my Dad”.
Through our emails, she told me about her father, Jacob Engram Jr., and his father, Jacob, who immigrated from Austria-Hungary and was a farmer. While growing up her father lived in the vicinity of today’s Bronx-Whitestone Bridge, and later on a rented farm in the Pelham Bay area. I knew there was some family connection because my grandmother loved her flowers and tending to her gardens.
My Aunt Judy helped put some pieces together in a phone conversation in November 2004. According to Judy, Uncle Jack Ingram had a farm “in Long Island”, and her parents would go there from Yonkers and help out. Uncle Jack had a son, Jack, who was in World War I and Aunt Judy remembered her mother kept up her Christmas tree until February, when “her nephew” Jack came home. The dates don’t add up but it’s interesting how that story got passed down. Jack served overseas during World War I from July 18, 1918, to July 13, 1919.
We continued our correspondence through the remainder of the year and determined that she attended my parent’s wedding on November 9, 1952. 72 years ago today! Joanne was only 7 years old so an older bride and a partially bald groom would be considered “mid-aged” in her eyes!
We emailed back and forth a few times and then didn’t talk again until 2016 and again in 2018. Life is like that sometimes!
And then, her kids gave her a DNA kit for Christmas in 2018. In March of 2019, we confirmed we were related. Oh boy, were we related! We were so much related that she and I shared twice the cMs compared to me and my first cousins. It also explained why some DNA matches were only between us and not between my maternal cousins.
I went to the experts – the Ancestry DNA Facebook group. My question “Why do I share 1,040 cMs with this person and only 527 and 467 with my first cousins” was met with “You need to talk to your mother”. Since my mother had been gone for 32 years by 2019, I answered my own question.
Joanne was my half aunt and her father, Jacob Engram, Jr., was also my mother’s father.
Shocked is putting it mildly.
My initial reactions were: 1) The work I’ve done on the Posluszny and Straub side was all for nothing!, 2) All the DNA matches associated with the last name “Duy” made sense because that was Jacob’s mother’s maiden name and, 3) not only were Julianna and Konrad Posluszny related (3rd cousins perhaps), but geez, Julianna and Jacob were related as well!
If there was any question of being related, I have the photographic proof:
That would probably be the bad side of the discovery because it did shake me up a bit.
I’m fascinated by the timing because my grandmother and family were living in New Britain in 1921 when she would have become pregnant. Did she know? Did she tell him her suspicions? Did their relationship continue after my mother was born? This is where I’d love to be a time traveler (and I’d have to let it happen again so that I would be assured I exist!).
The good side of the discovery is that I have an aunt! Jacob married in 1934 and had a daughter in 1945. Although she and my mother never knew each other, they did meet and/or knew about each other as a part of the family. Joanne lives in Pennsylvania and we have not met face to face yet. We are Facebook friends and we share any ancestry information we come across.
So this event would definitely qualify as my favorite discovery!
Last night the New York Yankees kept their World Series hopes alive by beating the Los Angeles Dodgers 11-4 and bringing the series 3 games (Dodgers) to 1 (Yankees).
My dad was a Brooklyn Dodgers fan and continued to root for them after they took off for Los Angeles after the 1957 season so he’s probably cheering them on from up above!
He did get to see the Yankees win the Series in 1950 when he drove his older brother and his friends down to Yankee Stadium to watch the fourth and final game of the series. I wrote about it in June 2023, The World Series Chauffeur.
I hope you enjoy it and Go Yankees? or Go Dodgers?
The topic for Week 32 of 52 Ancestors in 52 Weeks is Free Space. I have a feeling the topic means a post of my choosing. Maybe that’s why it has taken me a couple of weeks to write a post!
This week will be for updates on new information, the family found, and a little “how I did it back then”.
There has been a big push to scan records for online searches. There are two sites – Geneteka and Skanoteka – and both take a little getting used to. Above is the record for my grandmother, Julianna Ingram. To find the record first I had to locate the Padew records, the years (some have large ranges), the record type (U-birth, M-marriage, Z-death), and then start browsing the records. Above the circle area, the section of the book is shadowed. If there’s nothing on the 2 pages I head to the next. This record raises questions about her date of birth. It was 1888, and I think it’s under March because she was baptized on the 4th. I can’t quite figure out the date but all my other records indicate the 19th of February. It confirms the names I already have of her parents and grandparents. His occupation is agriculture and I noticed today that it says “colonist” after his name. I will check the records I have for the Ingram family!
Another good find that solved a mystery was Charles Posluszny’s birth record. Why? I had his date of birth listed as November 1888, and his brother Frank’s was September 1889. Now, that’s not an impossibility, but after some searching, I found his record, and he was born September 18, 1884!
For both the Posluszny/Ingram Family and the Jakiela Family, I have had distant family contacts share their information which has been a great help, but sometimes creates more mystery! On my Posluszny side, Kerry, who lives in New Jersey. We are related through the Straub/Burghardt line, including my great-grandmother, Caroline Straub Posluszny Bonk. We know that Julianna Ingram and Konrad Posluszny were 2nd or 3rd cousins so even though my mother isn’t a Posluszny, she shares DNA with Caroline. Crazy right?
On my Jakiela side, in 2013 through an Ancestry message board, I was contacted by someone whose family spelled their name Yakiela. That was a first for me and I bet they just got tired of correcting people on how to pronounce their name. It was spelled Jakieła. The J was pronounced as a Y and the ł has a “waa” sound. We pronounce it with a Ja (like Jar), Key, La, but people look at it blankly until I tell them. Anyway! We are related! We have a DNA match but haven’t found the person who connects us. We have shared hints over the years and when he paid someone in Poland to research family records, they accidentally sent him the actual scanned records and he shared with me! They revealed that my grandfather, Charles, lost his mother when he was only four years old, and then lost his wife, Antonia, when his youngest (my dad) was turning 3. In addition, I found a marriage record for my great-grandfather, Ignacy, and his second wife nine months later.
When I started working on family ancestry in the early 2000s, there was internet access, but not the online records available today. Census records are made available 72 years after they are collected. 1930 records were made public in 2002, 1940 records in 2012, and 1950 records only two years ago. I remember how excited I was to see the 1940 records!
Before that, I would head to the library to check town directories, use the microfilm for newspapers when I had dates, or even just an idea of one, and visually scan all the local sections. If I found a record online that I thought was important, I would write a letter to the town clerk or library to see if they could provide information. There was a lot of waiting for word back!
Now, through Newspapers(dot)com, I have that at my fingertips and use all sorts of word combinations for information.
The hardest part of the research and information is “where did I put that!”, especially with records that have been downloaded. I’m beginning to keep a list.
You would think that at this stage, I’ve found everyone within the last generation or two there is to be found right? Well, just last month (September 2024), I received a message from someone whose husband, Ben, discovered my blog. HIS great-grandfather was Charles Jakiela, my grandfather. His father was Ed Jakiela and his grandfather, my Uncle Eddie! Ben’s wife, Noel, and I have spent some time sending information back and forth. His father Ed, was married and had a son, David. About 1988, Ed’s wife passed away. I remember my dad driving to North Carolina with Uncle Eddie for the funeral. Ed remarried someone much younger and they had Ben. Ben knew nothing about his Jakiela family or that Uncle Eddie had four siblings! Ben and Noel live in South Carolina with their three sons and one daughter and it’s nice to know there are more Jakielas out there!
I hope you enjoyed a look at my ancestry research. I look forward to sharing new discoveries and more stories in the future!
Up next week: Favorite Discovery
The week 31 topic for 52 Ancestors in 52 Weeks is End of the Line. This story will not go in the direction you automatically think of when hearing “end of the line”.
If my teacher was putting the class in order of height, “Nancy, you go to the end of the line” would not come out of her mouth ever in 8 years at Holy Trinity School. Only if I was being separated from my sister or friends because I couldn’t stop talking!
My ancestors did NOT bring the height to my family. At the time of their ocean voyages, my grandfather Charles Jakiela, at 17 was 4’9”. My grandmother Antonia Liro, at 21 was also 4’9”. I have no ship manifest for my grandmother, Julianna Ingram, but her sister Mary’s record says she was 4’8”. My biological grandfather, Jacob Engram Jr, is listed as 5’9” on his WWII draft registration card. He’s a jolly green giant compared to the others.
The height issue is evident in Charles and Antonia’s 1912 wedding photo which looks like they put their heads into cardboard cut outs of a bride and groom.
Their four male children ended up between Steve at 5’5” and Walt who reached 5’9”. If his parents had been alive when he registered for the draft, he would have towered over them by a foot!
My dad, John Jakiela, was 5’6” and my mother was 5’3”. I always say, “if I wasn’t born a twin I bet I would have been taller!” But, in all seriousness, I’ll take my twin over the height.
Janice, at 18 months older, always had 2-3 inches on us. Just enough to not have to hem every pair of pants she got! Gail and I had a 4” growth spurt in 6th grade and except for a few more inches between then and 18, we were done at 4’11”. In standing in a line by height, we’re forever in the front and the shortest of all the relatives.
It pays to marry up! All five of the next generation are over 5 feet and the two of the next generation look like they will be able to take their place at… the end of the line.
I started my memories of my cousin Mal here and I’m going to continue the story now.
In Mal’s senior year of high school, he and 5 other young men in the state were selected by Senator Thomas Dodd to take the special examinations for an appointment to the Naval Academy. The senator “bypassed” the standard selection of principal and alternate and instead placed all of them chosen on a competitive basis and he was one of the two.
Mal headed off to Annapolis in 1960, the same year my twin and I were born, and our older sister was 2 years old – and he was our first cousin – a whole different generation.
Mal went to Annapolis with plans to play football. My Aunt Judy said he had to stop because of headaches but according to his obituary it was “an epic boxing match” that put an end to his football career.
When Mal was in high school he started dating Margaret Donroe – Margie – from Hamden. My aunt would tell us how they would be on the phone and Mal would have the phone resting on his shoulder as Margie just chatted away on the phone and he would grunt occasionally to let her know he was listening. Margie was so vivacious and pretty and I just thought they were the most beautiful couple in the world!
June was a busy time for the Bellafronto Family! Mal graduated from the Naval Academy on Wednesday, June 3 1964.
He and Marge were married three days later in Hamden Connecticut on Saturday, June 6th. My sisters and I were 6 and 4 and we were at the wedding but I’m not sure about the reception.
After their wedding and honeymoon, Mal and Marge headed off to his duty station in Yokosuka Japan where he would be aboard the guided missile light cruiser the USS Oklahoma City, the flagship of the 7th Fleet.
While they were in Japan, I would look out my bedroom window and watch the sun come up over the hill and I would think that on the other side of the hill was Japan and as the sun set there, it came up here! Their oldest son, Malcolm III, was born in Japan and their second son, Eric, was born in San Francisco after his tour was completed.
Whenever they would come to the east coast, Aunt Judy made sure everyone got together to visit with them.
After Mal left the Navy, he got into the paper industry. I remember them living in Pennsylvania, Wisconsin, maybe Illinois, California, and finally Oregon. It was too bad that by the time I moved to California, they had already moved!
As the years went by, we didn’t see them as often because Aunt Judy and Uncle Mal moved to Florida.
When my cousin Bill got married in Illinois in 1987, we were together with Mal and Marge (known as Maggie by then) for the first time in a long time. Aunt Judy and Uncle Mal were there too, and we’ve always had such a fun time being with them, this visit was no exception.
I saw Marge one last time at their son Eric’s wedding in San Jose in 1993 or 94 when we were living in California. Sadly, she passed away in 2009 after a reoccurrence of breast cancer.
Fast forward….
In 2013, Mal’s brother Bob was hosting a family reunion at our cottage in Lebanon CT for his daughter Cathy and her family visiting from Morocco. Mal, young Mal, and Eric came out from the west coast for the party. Bob and his wife Teri brought Aunt Judy who was now 96 years old. We had a wonderful time visiting with everyone! It felt like one of the Posluszny Fourth of July parties I’ve written about. We shared hours of memories and a lot of laughter.
The following year, 2014, Mal and Mary, his partner of a few years, were heading east. Mal would be attending his 40th Naval Academy reunion. I met with Mal during the week and we took a walk around the home on Clifton Street that his mother and mine grew up in. It was in bad shape after water damage and (probably) foreclosure, but the walkway to the back of the house was still there and the odd little entry into the basement.
I also contacted the owner of the family home on Lincoln Avenue to arrange a visit there. Their parents bought the house from Aunt Judy and Uncle Mal and they bought it from their parents. It really is a great neighborhood! We both enjoyed walking through the house, seeing the changes, and seeing what stayed the same.
Mary came out the following week, we had dinner together, and they stayed at our cottage in Lebanon Ct. The cottage his family had for the majority of his years growing up was in the next town so he and Mary spent time driving around the area and visiting the former family cottage on Pickerel Lake.
That would be the last time I saw him, but I enjoyed an email exchange, infrequent but more frequent than that with other long-distance family (hint, hint).
I talked to Mary, his partner last week and we had a nice conversation about their time together and my memories of him.
I found out earlier this month that one of my cousins passed away in Oregon on July 15th. If you know me, or read my posts, you know that I am the Keep of All Things Family so I wanted to share my memories and thoughts on him.
My cousin, Malcolm James Bellafronto Jr, was born in October of 1942. He was the son of my Aunt Judy, my mother’s next older sibling and her husband, Mal. He was nicknamed Butch (I don’t know how he got that name). They lived on North Orchard Street when he was born.
When he was a year old, my Uncle Mal went into the Navy and my Aunt Judy and Butch moved in with my grandmother, grandfather, Aunt Tootsie, and my mother. He was a big little kid! He shared a few stories with me and although he doesn’t recall much of living on Clifton Street, he did remember this story:
During the war my mother and I lived with Gram when my father was in the Navy. I don’t have any specific memories of that period. I do have some vague recollections of Grandpa P.
There was one incident that my mother told me about later. Apparently, I used to spend time out in back with Grandpa. You remember how big the garden was. There was a gate leading into the garden that you had to lift up to get in and out. Well I wandered into the house one time and everyone wanted to know how I got out of the garden. So I showed them, lifting the gate with a loud grunt. Evidently, Grandpa always grunted when he lifted the gate. Mal was 18 months old at the time of that video!
He was the center of attention while living on Clifton Street!
In 1945, while his dad was on leave, the three of them drove cross country to California where his ship was docked. Aunt Judy and Butch were planning on staying with her Tante Lizzie and Uncle Ben while Mal was out to sea but he got back on board ship and was told he fulfilled his service and so was done and they came back home to Connecticut.
His brother Bob was born four years later and they eventually moved around the corner from us on Lincoln Drive in a home that Uncle Mal built with help from the students in the Wilcox Tech carpentry program where he was an automotive teacher.
The majority of males in our family attended Notre Dame High School in West Haven, CT. He played football there and relayed the following story to me:
“For the 3 summers of my high school years I would live with Gram for the two weeks before school started. My dad had August off and the family would stay at the lake in Moodus. I started early for football, 3 a day drills. Walk to the train station in the morning, train to New Haven then 2 buses to West Haven. We were on the field by 8 and finished up around 4. Then buses, train and walk to Gram’s. What I remember was how long her hair was and how she would brush it every night while we watched TV. And she was an absolute fanatic about wrestling, pounding the couch and yelling at the TV. For the 3 summers of my high school years I would live with Gram for the two weeks before school started”
Also – “But the main memory is of Gram’s cooking. The pastries she made on holidays. Her cheesecake was out of this world. Tootsie got the cheese part right but could never get the crust. As far as regular meals, I remember everything being overcooked and pretty well tasteless.”
He also told me that when they were building the stairs for the cottage in Colchester, he was the free labor! He said it was a lot of hard work and it kept him in shape for football.
He also told this story about staying at Gram’s house during the summer and the trains that passed along the side of the house going from the steel mill to the main railroad tracks:
“I also remember picking up coal that the engineer would throw into the yard when they stopped at the street. You remember the train tracks going to the steel mill behind the house.
I slept in the front bdrm by the tracks. I distinctly remember one night when I was staying there for football waking up in the middle of the night to the most god-awful noise and most brilliant white light filling the room. Had no idea where I was and what was happening.
When I finally came around enough to look out the window, I saw that the commotion was a very large steam engine stopping at the street with its carbon arc front light shining in the window. Scared the hell out of me.”
I hope you don’t mind if I end this here. After graduation from Notre Dame High School, Mal was heading to the Naval Academy in Annapolis Maryland.
To Be Continued….
It's All About Family 